A message for Delete Me First readers from my niece, Hadley Seward
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Quotes of the week
When a true genius appears in this world you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.
Jonathan Swift
Jonathan Swift
I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.
~Kahlil Gibran
All my life I used to wonder what I would become when I grew up. Then, about seven years ago, I realized that I was never going to grow up - that growing is an ever ongoing process.
M. Scott Peck, M.D.
M. Scott Peck, M.D.
I put instant coffee in a microwave and almost went back in time.
Steven Wright
Meditation of the week
AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES (That Really Work!)
1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE
ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU SLICE.
2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.
3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.
4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.
7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.
DAILY THOUGHT: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.
Poem of the Week
I rode the metro this afternoon from Georges-Vanier to Vendome.
You sat next to me and were wearing a tuque.
You were trying to open up some sort of electronic device that was shelled in tough plastic.
I watched as you tried jamming your keys through the packaging and failed repeatedly to retrieve what was on the inside.
I found the way you would scowl and swear to yourself every few seconds charming and it was when you threw your hands up in the air in despair that I really swooned.
I really wanted you to get the prize on the inside while I was there to witness it-
That was until you ripped a part of the packaging off and threw it away on the floor of the metro car without skipping a beat.
You discarded your garbage onto the rest of the passengers, without a care in the world.
The spell was over, and your childish fits of rage were no longer cute to me.
I fell in and out of love with you during a three stop metro ride.
I all of a sudden hated you. and your stupid electronic thing.
I hope you never get through that packaging.
You sat next to me and were wearing a tuque.
You were trying to open up some sort of electronic device that was shelled in tough plastic.
I watched as you tried jamming your keys through the packaging and failed repeatedly to retrieve what was on the inside.
I found the way you would scowl and swear to yourself every few seconds charming and it was when you threw your hands up in the air in despair that I really swooned.
I really wanted you to get the prize on the inside while I was there to witness it-
That was until you ripped a part of the packaging off and threw it away on the floor of the metro car without skipping a beat.
You discarded your garbage onto the rest of the passengers, without a care in the world.
The spell was over, and your childish fits of rage were no longer cute to me.
I fell in and out of love with you during a three stop metro ride.
I all of a sudden hated you. and your stupid electronic thing.
I hope you never get through that packaging.
